Stressed Mum

Archive for July, 2009

One of those weeks. The neighbours had obviously gone away and left a teen or two in charge, with predictable results! The first couple of times we asked them they turned the music down, only for it to become even louder half an hour later. By half past 12, however, they were shouting and laughing and then a fight broke out. Having put up with several evenings of this I had had enough and called the police. That worked! I overheard one girl saying she had cleaned the blood off the carpet then someone saw the police car and they went into overdrive. Bottles were thrown into the recycling bin, music turned down and peace finally descended. I haven’t heard a peep out of them since.
By Thursday there were nine of us in the house. My three daughters were arguing, boyfriends and friend keeping out of the way, son hiding with the computer. I was getting stressed about feeding and finding bedding for everyone (only one had to sleep on the floor and all had quilts and pillows!), hubby went to work! Daughter and friend brought with them a dog and two rabbits, other daughter brought a turtle, I don’t like animals. A warning light came on in my car; I took it to be checked out at the garage as I am driving to Wales in it tomorrow. Cancel that, it won’t be fixed until Monday so I’m driving to Wales on Monday. My nephew has helped find temporary night shelter for the dog, one daughter and her boyfriend have departed to Lourdes and things are a little calmer. When the children were small I thought life would be simpler when they were more independent. No chance. When am I ever going to get the peaceful life I crave? And will I want it when it comes?

Yesterday was my eldest daughter’s graduation. My husband took a day off work and we drove up to the university in good time. We got on the graduation shuttle bus from the car park to the robing rooms, she emerged looking every bit the bright young lady she is and we were very proud parents indeed. She had a lovely day meeting up with her friends and we came away with a beautiful set of photos, unusual nowadays for her to let us take even one photo so they will be treasured.
The ceremony itself was a cross between Hogwarts and Parliament with a touch of church service thrown in. There were gowns and funny hats, processions and trumpets, organ music and hand shaking. All that was needed were a few owls swooping over the graduates heads and some candles hovering over their heads and it could easily have been part of a Harry Potter set or maybe some incense and a couple of hymns to complete the picture of a church service.
The main thing is we have come through high points and low, tantrums and tears, successes and failures and now have an educated, adult daughter ready to make her own way in the world. We are there for her always but she has to take her own path now and make her own decisions. I pray that life will be kind to her.

Do you dread that question? I do. The answer is often “I have no idea, what do you want?” The problem with this is that often what they want involves a trip to the supermarket. No longer. I have decided to revolutionise mealtimes. (Slight exaggeration but it makes me feel good!) I have worked out a 3 step strategy.

Step 1 – Plan a menu in advance. This advice has been thrown at me over the years and I have chosen to ignore it but now I’ve tried it and, guess what? It works! I tried planning for a month at a time but this was too much. A week is ideal but even a few days ahead makes life simpler.

Step 2 – Write a shopping list. I have returned to online grocery shopping after a long break and it really does save time. It saves arguments too. ”Sorry we can’t have that, I’ll order the ingredients for next week” puts paid to long discussions and extra shopping trips. This strategy saves money too as you can’t pick up extras as you walk around the supermarket.

Step 3 – Be flexible. Sometimes I don’t have time to make what was planned or I put the shopping order off for a couple of days and improvise from the cupboard, sometimes the family bring extras for feeding and you use up ingredients planned for another day. I have discovered that this doesn’t matter. So long as everyone is fed and happy it is easy to get back on track.

Ok. Lasagne and dough balls on the menu for tonight so I’d better get to work.

Due to some technical difficulties a number of my posts disappeared so I have copied them here just in case anyone is interested!

I have been doing some stitching during the last couple of weeks. My friend taught me how to make a foundation pieced patchwork block called, I think, pineapple block. This is hand-stitched onto a piece of interfacing. I know to make a quilt I would have to make at least another 19, luckily I don’t have any more fabric so I can’t, but I have really enjoyed making this one. If I ever get round to making it into a cushion I will let you know!

I have also just spent a very pleasant weekend in the Lake District. Just myself and my husband. This is something which does not happen very often. We stayed in a lovely hotel and the sun shone. We ate delicious food and drank very nice wine. Daughter number 3 tried to intrude with stories of an allergy developed in Spain and a steroid injection delivered by a Spanish doctor but a couple of texts and phone calls later she was much better and there was nothing I could do about it anyway!
Peace at last
After a hectic two weeks I am finally back to writing.
I have now done my exams, they weren’t too bad and as I can do nothing about them now I will just wait for results day in August.
During the last fortnight, as well as my own exams I have spent a pleasant evening in a hotel in Lancaster helping my eldest with maths for an exam, which she has now, thankfully, passed. I have calmed my scared of flying 17 year old and driven her to the airport in the middle of the night for a long-awaited holiday. I have ferried middle daughter and her boyfriend around, but not too much. I have cooked, too much, cleaned, not as much as I should and washed marathon-style. I have accompanied my son’s youth group on an activity day, and discovered climbing, abseiling and rock scrambling are much harder than they were twenty years ago and make me ache more! My husband and I have also celebrated our Silver Wedding (25 years and no time off for good behaviour!). I feel tired just thinking about it all.
Today I am driving to Sheffield to take middle daughter and boyfriend back to their University accommodation to clear up, pack and move to new accommodation ready for next year, they will be away a week and a half. Peace at last! For that week and a half there will be just myself, husband and 12 year old son. Sounds like a holiday! Plans include cleaning all unoccupied bedrooms, belated anniversary celebration for hubby and me, less cooking and meal out with friends. Bliss! Hope I don’t get bored!
June 23rd, 2009 |
Revision and Brownies
I have finally written my essay. I have been attempting it for a week and it is a few weeks late. The exams are this month so I could put it off no longer. Somehow I was dreading it more and more the longer I left it but once I got started it seemed to flow. I have mock exams to do now but somehow I think they will have to be incorporated into my revision as time is running very short.
I am now deep into revision for my first exam but somehow my family still want to eat and wear clean clothes. Can’t they see I’m busy? Still at least I’ll have a good excuse if I don’t do as well as I hope.
Did manage a short break to make some chocolate brownies for tea. They are chocolatey, squidgy and delicious, just as brownies should be. Thank you Jamie Oliver.
June 7th, 2009 |